I saw the looks you were giving us the other night as my three-year-old smeared his ice cream cone all over his face. I saw you scowl at me as I laughed and smiled at him. I saw you mumble and mutter to each other. I tried to talk to you, to include you in the joke, but you continued to scowl.
I could tell that you were judging me, my child, my parenting, his behavior, and pretty much everything about me. I could tell that you instantly labeled him a brat. I knew that you believed that he was a brat because of some shortcoming of mine.It was written all over your face, it was unmistakable.
Here's the thing, while I agree that smearing vanilla ice cream all over one's face is not usually the most socially acceptable thing to do, I know that my sweet boy just wanted to make everyone smile. In return, all that he asked was that everyone smile at him and maybe laugh.
My son is a people person. He loves being around people and he remembers almost everyone he meets. He still asks for friends that moved away more than a year ago, because they still matter to him. He just wanted to impress you and all he received from you was a scowl. I just want you to know that.
Ice cream is easily cleaned. It's sticky and a mess, but it's not one of those messes you can never come back from. Sometimes, a little ice cream mess is worth the smiles and the memory. In this case it was, and I don't appreciate your judgment.
Living with a three-year-old is not easy. We fight a lot, we are odds all day most days. I look forward to sending him to school because I feel like all that I do is yell at him. You should judge me for that, rather than letting him smear himself with vanilla goodness. Certainly my lack of patience and understanding for my child is more of a crime than my letting him act like a kid and have some fun.
I hope that you realize these things when you finally have kids. It would be better if you learned them before, that way the next time a child wants a smile, you will oblige. Smiling works more muscles anyways.
Regards,
Molly
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