To Dream.

Dear Dreams,

I don't believe you can all come true. I don't believe if I reach for the stars and miss I will land on a cloud. I only kind of sort of believe I can be anything I want to be, and do whatever I set my mind to. Maybe I believe that last one, but am just too lazy to take full ownership of the belief because it would mean work. And rejection. And possibly debt. I think the real problem though, is that I have too many desires to label any one of them a dream. A "dream" implies that once it has come to fruition one may die happy.
I want to own a stellar pizza place, have a masters in psychology and spend time working in an addiction rehabilitation center, live in a mud hut in Africa as a missionary, own a thrift store, write a book- write a few books, spend my middle life traveling around the US in an Airstream trailer with Travis...to name a few. I don't know how to decide where to start, much less start actually working towards any of it. I have two little kids and as of right now, my job is to raise them. Where does all the dreaming fit in? I know lots of people have little kids and go to school full time and work full time and sit in Starbucks and write award winning novels while their babies rest in carriers--but all that seems more like hell then dreaming.
I don't want to work in misery to live a dream. I keep waiting for God to give me some glimpse of the larger picture so I have a clue as to what dream is even intended for me by Him...as for now, I mostly only dream when I am sleeping.

-Brooks