Joy

Auntie-

I think of you all the time. I remember your blond hair and your big, white smile. I remember your dedication to Mary Kay and how you got a diamond ring for doing so well with it. I remember your house on Berkeley and I remember when you were pregnant with L.

I thought you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. I loved that you and my mom were such good friends because it was like having two moms. Also, I thought you guys looked a lot alike and since you acted like sisters it was a lot of fun for me to pretend that you were the aunt I didn't have.

Then, when I was 11 years old, my mom got sober. She cleaned up her life and turned things around. Part of making it in AA is to change the crowd that you hang out with. That meant that my mom could not hang out with you anymore. I found out that you and my mom were drinking and drug buddies. I stopped seeing you.

I have heard of you from time to time in the fourteen years since my mom cut ties with you. I know that you aren't sober still and that you have had a lot of troubles. I have always been pulling for you, Auntie. I still love you. I still have faith that you can do it.

I have the faith that someday I can meet you for lunch to celebrate your sobriety birthday and we will sit down and you will love on my children and I will love on you. It's been a dream of mine for fourteen years that someday we will reconnect. I wish you the best. I wish you happiness and peace. I wish you all the joy that a sober life will bring you.

You are missed and you are missing out.

Love,
Molly